(3 Minute Read)
Managing in human services can feel like you're fighting the wind. Let me explain.
You've been there, a windy day, umbrella up, trying to prevent being totally soaked, but not succeeding.
You think you've mastered the wind/rain barrier, positioning the umbrella in the sweet spot, when suddenly the wind changes direction, turning your umbrella inside out, exposing you completely.
All your attempts, the focus, the energy, landing the sweet spot, everything coming together just as you hoped, only to evaporate right before your eyes.
It feels like the same weather pattern you've been navigating, year in and year out.
Every time there is a change in policy, budget, business rules or practice standards you have to adjust your umbrella. All that energy and focus needed once again.
“So how do you become weather resistant?” I hear you ask…..
You could invest in a larger umbrella, but that just gives the wind a larger resistance area to play with.
You could just stay indoors and hide, and I have to admit that seems very attractive some days.
But wouldn’t it be better to be able to control the weather? So how do you do that?
I describe the weather as the emotional responses to the events around us. Yes, they can be incredibly stressful and have wide reaching impacts and consequences, however, if you can master your emotional response you DO get to control the weather.
Let me explain. You will know this logically, what you think leads to what you feel which leads to what you do. For example, news of funding cuts sends your logical mind into overdrive mapping out every scenario that could go wrong. I bet you don’t think of many scenarios that included what could be good about this? I hear you, what’s good about funding cuts? Possibly nothing but when we are locked in catastrophic thinking, we don’t see the opportunity. And there is always opportunity.
That same catastrophic thinking leads to feelings of anxiety, stress, fear, sadness, guilt or a myriad of other negative emotions. Those negative emotions trigger the chemicals in your body that leads you to actions focused on defending, surviving and in some cases surrendering.
What if you could interrupt the thoughts to consider it from different perspectives, not just the one that is looking for all the things that could go wrong? That might seem nuts, I know, but it has worked for me. Step into the shoes of others to understand what they are trying to achieve can help open up possibilities and opportunities, at the same time reducing negative emotions and leading to more informed and might I say inspired action.
The next time a change lands in your lap, pause before you act. Ask three questions. It takes about two minutes.
What am I telling myself? Write down the worst-case story your mind is running. Seeing it on paper takes some of the impact.
What am I feeling? Name it in one word. Naming it gives you a little distance from it.
Whose shoes can I step into? Pick one person affected, such as a participant, a team member or a planner. Ask what they are trying to achieve and what they need from you.
Then choose one action that serves that person, rather than the one that protects you.
You will not stop the wind. The rules will keep changing. What you can change is how long each gust controls your day. Every time you interrupt the spiral, the next one costs you less.
Do it with others. A peer who has stood in the same storm can see an angle you cannot.